Without wishing to gloat: HA HA, I NOW OWN AN ARMANI LIPSTICK, which as you know is only available in the US at select Saks Fifth Avenue stores. If those back-cover ads in Vogue and Bazaar haven’t made you moan with envy and yearning, you don’t even deserve this lipstick. However, the rest of you need to have it. Whatever it takes, get that damn lipstick, in the silky matte formula. Mine (#5, a slightly blue red) was a gift, that’s how much I rule. It was purchased in New York City, by a person I’ll call “Mark”, while I frantically screamed instructions into the static of his mobile phone. I could hear the foreign salesclerk’s irritable voice as she snapped: “What shade of red?," as though he’d just arrived on a boat from Lithuania. It is a smoothe, light-textured lipstick whose elegant black case closes with a confirmatory click to rival Chanel's. Plus, there is no fragrance to distract you from the glorious tactile experience of gliding it over your lips as you admire yourself in the mirror. Sometimes it's hard to be a woman, but not when you're applying an Armani lipstick!
Less momentous but still good are the other additions to the Nigress Immaculata Museum of Red Lipstick:
